Monday, February 25, 2013

Don't Be Fooled by a Fake Review

With the increase of companies paying people to give them positive reviews in social media, I thought this would be quite handy. This example is helpful in determining whether or not a review is authentic.


Wednesday, February 13, 2013

How to Win Your Crush Over: The Body Language of Attraction


In celebration of Valentine’s Day I thought I’d do a post about attraction. What is it that makes certain people more likeable than others?

Through some research I was able to compile a list of things that naturally attract us to other people. Even if you already have a significant other, these tips are sure to reduce awkwardness in social situations:

  1.   The Power of Touch: studies show that people become more comfortable around those that they come into body contact with. It could be as simple as brushing them with your left hand while shaking  their right hand, or by brushing hands with them while passing them an object.(Don't abuse this if you don't want to be seen as a creeper)
  2. Open Body Language: this includes avoiding crossing your arms and facing the person you are communicating with.
  3.  Don’t use objects to block your body: To appear more open and welcoming during a conversation avoid clutching your purse in front of you or keeping a coffee cup in front of you at a coffee date. Try keeping it on the side so that your torso is open toward the person you are speaking to.
  4. Get your crush to do a favour for you: You know from yourself that when you do something nice for someone it makes you feel good. Psychologically, it makes you like the person you are doing the favour for (within limits of course) because you think “wow, this someone must be really special to me because I am spending time helping them”. Make your crush feel the same way.
  5. Laugh and smile: Studies show that women laugh more with men they’re attracted to and men are attracted to women who laugh at their jokes. Men are more attracted to women who smile.
  6.  Mirror the body language: When people get to know each other better, they tend to start mimicking each other’s body language. You can create that feeling of bonding by slightly adjusting to your crush’s body language. For example if one of you is sitting with a laid back posture, you can gradually start to mimic it as you talk.
  7. Move together: People who move together, such as dancing or walking, develop stronger bonds with each other.
  8. Speaking into someone’s left ear or touching their forearm will make a person more willing to do something for you.

And the last and most important trick of all is to be yourself. You can certainly adjust your body language to help ease the tension in a social situation, but if your love interest isn’t responding to your attempts...move on. If it were as simple as following a few steps then no one would be hating or whining about having a crappy valentine’s day. The single people get sad that they aren’t dating and those in relationships wake up thinking the day will be magical and their unrealistic expectations end up setting them up for disappointment.

Regardless of how you spend February 14th, just remember to focus on giving as much love as possible to those around you and you’ll never be disappointed.




Happy loving and d-coding,

Darya 

P.S. you can now follow me on twitter for more tips @DaryaDen

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Social Etiquette: What People Secretly Like


Grade 12 was a year in my life when I was “coming out of my shell”. All the university applications were due and in order to have something useful to add to them, I’ve had to get out of my comfort zone and actually take risks – such as run for  president of a charity club I was part of and do some public speaking.
Since I’m a big book nerd, during that time period I have read more self-help books than any sane person would admit to. But as they say “In order to become wise you only need to read 10 books, but to find those 10 you need to read hundreds”. And so one particular self help book I read 6 years ago, is still definitely in my top 10 books list.

How To Talk to Anyone” is basically a list of things we can do to please people and avoid awkward social situations. I don’t know how the author does it but somehow many of those tricks stuck with me right away. To save you all some time, I’ve compiled a list of some of my favourite ones here. I bet you will be nodding that you would really appreciate it if someone showed this type of social etiquette while interacting with you.

  1. Pretend that every new person that you meet is an old friend of yours (your body language will naturally change as you greet them) – who doesn’t love a warm greeting?
  2. After a compliment, thank them back with another compliment: "That was insightful, you are very kind"
  3. Sound like a boss when trying to get an admin to connect you with someone."Hi, Darya here. Is she in?" refer to person you are calling as he/she, him/her. This will create the illusion that you are close with whoever you are trying to reach, maybe increasing the chances of you getting through.
  4.  Overlook their bloopers – if someone spills their wine, don’t draw attention to it ..just silently pass them a napkin and continue the conversation without interruptions
  5. Whenever someone’s story interrupted, let the interruption take over, but then go back to their story. – I can always relate to that awkward feeling of whether or not I should finish my story. If it happens to someone else, make sure you let them finish
  6.  Let them savor the favor – people feel good about doing nice things, repay them, but not right away “tit for-wait-wait-tat”
  7. Before speaking, let them empty their tanks first – if you want someone’s full attention, make sure you hear everything they have to say first and then go into your story.
  8. Lead the listeners (be the first to applaud or encore etc) – make the presenter feel more confident by supporting them first
  9.  Limit the fidget – it will make whatever you say sound more sincere.
  10. Have a good posture (this is my forever-failing new year’s resolution L)
The actual book has many more tips, you can find it here.

Happy D-coding,


Darya