How to Win Your Crush Over: The Body Language of Attraction

In celebration of Valentine’s Day I thought I’d do a post about attraction. What is it that makes certain people more likeable than others?

Through some research I was able to compile a list of things that naturally attract us to other people. Even if you already have a significant other, these tips are sure to reduce awkwardness in social situations:

1.   The Power of Touch: studies show that people become more comfortable around those that they come into body contact with. It could be as simple as brushing them with your left hand while shaking  their right hand, or by brushing hands with them while passing them an object.(Don't abuse this if you don't want to be seen as a creeper)
2. Open Body Language: this includes avoiding crossing your arms and facing the person you are communicating with.
3.  Don’t use objects to block your body: To appear more open and welcoming during a conversation avoid clutching your purse in front of you or keeping a coffee cup in front of you at a coffee date. Try keeping it on the side so that your torso is open toward the person you are speaking to.
4. Get your crush to do a favour for you: You know from yourself that when you do something nice for someone it makes you feel good. Psychologically, it makes you like the person you are doing the favour for (within limits of course) because you think “wow, this someone must be really special to me because I am spending time helping them”. Make your crush feel the same way.
5. Laugh and smile: Studies show that women laugh more with men they’re attracted to and men are attracted to women who laugh at their jokes. Men are more attracted to women who smile.
6.  Mirror the body language: When people get to know each other better, they tend to start mimicking each other’s body language. You can create that feeling of bonding by slightly adjusting to your crush’s body language. For example if one of you is sitting with a laid back posture, you can gradually start to mimic it as you talk.
7. Move together: People who move together, such as dancing or walking, develop stronger bonds with each other.
8. Speaking into someone’s left ear or touching their forearm will make a person more willing to do something for you.

And the last and most important trick of all is to be yourself. You can certainly adjust your body language to help ease the tension in a social situation, but if your love interest isn’t responding to your attempts...move on. If it were as simple as following a few steps then no one would be hating or whining about having a crappy valentine’s day. The single people get sad that they aren’t dating and those in relationships wake up thinking the day will be magical and their unrealistic expectations end up setting them up for disappointment.

Regardless of how you spend February 14th, just remember to focus on giving as much love as possible to those around you and you’ll never be disappointed.

Happy loving and d-coding,

Darya 

P.S. you can now follow me on twitter for more tips @DaryaDen